NZ : Greymouth - Travel Wankers Dinner.

"From air to table in less than 10 hours'

 - Susie Cox

Travel Wankers Dinner


INGREDIENTS :

- 2 silly girls
- 3 hunters willing to humour them
- 1 sitting duck
- 2 MASSIVE F OFF GUNS!


RECIPE  SERVES 3


Step 1 : Become fixated with the idea of wanting to shoot and eat an animal (in essence become slightly Ferral)

Step 2 : Be on the look out for a man in a flannel shirt. When you spot him, accost him, and his friends. Play 21 questions regarding hunting until the guys give in and offer to take the morning off work for a hunt (exchange an afternoon of manual labour to sweeten the deal.)

Step 3 : Drive in to the middle of the woods with 3 strange men and two very big shotguns (avoid telling parents until the end of the recipe.)

Step 4 : Hike through native bush and private land, mushroom spotting and trying to be very quiet until you reach the duck hole.

Step 5 : Allow men to SHOOT! Whilst we stand back and video the whole thing.

Step 6 : Collect your prize. WARNING : Do not wade out in to cold river to retrieve. Lets keep this recipe safe people!

Step 7 : In order to ensure safety allow women to only shoot shotgun at inanimate target such as a dustbin lid.

Step 8: Leave duck to ripen in garage during the afternoon whilst heading off to learn how to lay a driveway and play around with a Digger.

Step 9 : Follow instruction given by 'The Boss' on how to de-head, de-wing, de-foot and de-gut a duck. Essential tools : Axe and chopping block for maximum efficiency, sharp knife also advised.    

Step 10 : Once carcass is prepared place in oven bag in casserole dish to maintain precious juices and allow to cook for around an hour.

Step 11 : Prepare accompaniments, we suggest :
- Savoy cabbage and leeks
- Mashed potato and kumara
- Steamed Broccoli.
- Gravy made using the duck fat.

STEP 12 : Enjoy with new friends!   

This blog comes with many thanks to Alan (The Boss), Jimmy and Stepi who showed us that Greymouth is worth more than just Pancake rocks.

We politely declined an offer to stay at the Boss's house, not wanting to impose more than we already had and ended up staying at Global Village Back Packers. This was an incredible hostel with all the warmth and hospitality you would expect from home. Kindly staff such as Simon, who was a real gem, ensured our own room away from the noisy hitchhikers we'd picked up along the way.

Our first hunting trip was a blinding success.

Peace and Love,

Jan and Sooz.